You see and hear it everywhere: "You poor thing," "You are so strong," "Cancer Sucks" (I'm not gonna lie, that is truer than true), and you even see statistics about survival, relapse, secondary cancers, and even about how many marriages suffer as a result of having a child with cancer. We have joined this "club" referred to as cancer parents. Again, I would like to say "No, Thank You." But, we do not have that choice. No parent or family member of a child with cancer gets to make that choice. You only get to ask the question of "What's next?" or "What do we need to do?" If you are lucky, a proven course of treatment is laid out, and you follow it. If you are really lucky, it works. I am not a poor thing, and I am only strong when and because I have to be. That is something else that is not a choice. My son and my family need me. It is that simple. And, yes, cancer still sucks. It still gets to me sometimes. But not as much lately as it seems I have my son almost back to normal.
Through this situation, one thing has become apparent: I have a great support system. I am most thankful for Eric, my husband/Logan's dad. We support each other, and stick together through all of the frustrations. He cheers me up when I get sad, and celebrates with me during the happy times. I am not saying that all the stress of Logan's diagnosis has not taken it's toll on both of us, but we are hanging in there together. We try and make things normal for both kids, and lessen the impact on us as a family. And our daughter, Alexis, is always a bright spot ready to cheer any and all of us up if needed.
My parents have been wonderful. They were here for us within hours of my call telling them of Logan's diagnosis and they have been here whenever we needed them. I know that we don't talk as much as we used to, but I know they understand the hectic time we are in and respect that. Many of their friends are following us and helping from afar as much as they can. Eric's parents were also here very soon after the call, and they have been here when we needed them as well. They also have many friends and neighbors who are helping from afar. All this has allowed me to continue to work through Logan's treatment which is necessary for us to live and continue to have health benefits. We also appreciate that our families respected our need to be together as a small family after such a long time of having company through Logan's toughest part of treatment. We know it was hard to be away from us and the kids, but we needed the time to get back to "normal." Whatever that really is. Though, I do have to admit, it is possible to forget for time during the day that we are living with the shadow of cancer in our lives. We are reminded each and every day due to the frustrating dinner time routine and medicines, but we still play outside, do activities and have fun.
We are also thankful for our extended family that includes the kid's great grandparents (Big Granny and Big Papa), Rick who checks in from time to time, Uncle B, Aunt Nic and baby Emma, Aunt Linda and Uncle Al, Aunt Margie and Uncle Dale all of whom have either checked on us or sent care packages and/or cards. Our close friends and neighbors Candice, Seth and Weston, Christie, Autumn, Reegan, and Kodie, and Karyn, Bryn and Cam. I would be remiss if I did not mention the teachers, specialists, and others at Alexis' school who are supporting us and often watch her after school including Leigh, Emily, Pam, Beverly, Cindy, Carol, and many others who have provided meals, gift cards and words of encouragement. My teams at work are also supporting us and often asking how we are as well as the occasional gift card, home cooked meal, or words of encouragement. The parents of Alexis' soccer team have been so supportive and have given us so much. The Craic Addicts including Pam (again), Katie, Daelyn and Kris (and many others). There are so many other organizations that have sent us packages, items, and cards that we cannot include them all. And even the anonymous family that paid for our dinner at the restaurant during the holiday season.
I know that I have not included all who have given us support, love, etc. But you know who you are (even if you don't read this), and we thank you. You are so much appreciated, it is beyond words. Your kind acts have impacted our lives and will never be forgotten. I know this has been long, and I appreciate you reading to the end. I will leave you with a cute picture from the kids dying Easter eggs:
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